TNZKMA 129

１２９

 

I accidentally blurted it out. Dole forcibly pulled my hands away as I hurriedly covered my mouth.

[No hiding it.]

Thinking about it, I lowered my voice and spoke in a low voice.

Everyone knows that there are many priest families, but not many people know that there are differences in their abilities.

Everyone knows that there are many priest families, but not many people know that there are differences in their abilities.

Dole knows this, and Olphynn who talked about it doesn’t seem to plan to hide it,  plus it’s related to the monster’s appearance, so I went ahead and talked about the Crest of Subtlety.

[Hmm, well, what’s done is done, but I wonder if they’ll let me go through the Ceremony again…]

Dole sure is optimistic. I wonder if he doesn’t hold any grudges. He waited decades for this and paid a fortune, after all.

[Don’t you feel frustrated or anything?]

[About what?]

[Well… uh, you waited so long to go through the Ceremony, right? And just when you finally got to do it, it failed. When I appeared, Saine was so shocked he ran off somewhere.]

[Saine ran to me. Then, alcohol.]

Dole teased, and Saine’s arm came at him, but he dodged by simply ducking his head.

[Yeah, it was the long-awaited Ceremony. Sure, it’s disappointing, but this isn’t exactly a normal situation, right? If it had been a male Reincarnator, there wouldn’t be a chance for a redo, but since a monster came out, I’m thinking it should be okay. In other words, I’ll probably get to have the Ceremony again. And this time, with the previous failure as leverage, the priest will make sure to bring someone who won’t mess up.]

Dole said this cheerfully, then lowered his voice just a bit.

[And besides, I don’t really have anyone to hold a grudge against.]

[What do you mean?]

As I asked, Saine gently touched my arm.

[The ones who performed the Ceremony, the Crest of Subtlety, right? Well, they’re all dead.]

[Huh…?]

My heart skipped a beat.

[The monster appeared during the Ceremony. I managed to escape, but the priests… they were killed in the first attack.] 

Dole raised both hands as if giving up.

[Yeah, the moment I saw it, I knew it was a dangerous monster. Plus, I was unarmed since we were told not to carry weapons during the Ceremony.]

[Of course you’d run.]

[Right?]

As Dole and Saine spoke, I listened, my heart pounding so loudly it drowned out their voices. My whole body felt like it had become a heartbeat.

I’d seen plenty of monsters, and I’d come close to dying. But now, it hit me for real—there are people who actually got killed by monsters.

[The strong wind I felt… could that have been a Saine the monster was coming out?]

I asked, and Saine nodded, probably. At the moment I got blown away and fell underground, lots of people must’ve died.

A large hand gripped my arm. At some point, my body had started trembling.

[The plaza’s a wreck. The priests’ mansion collapsed, and the ground’s all torn up. Honestly, it was good that you got thrown into the hole. If you’d stayed there, you might not have made it.]

[What about Olphynn…?]

[He’s fine. Actually, he’s kind of a key player right now.]

[Thank goodness… Oh, wait, I mean, it’s terrible that so many people died, but… I’m really relieved Olphynn survived. I know I shouldn’t think that, but…]

[There’s nothing wrong with that. It’s a natural reaction.]

[Exactly. If you start worrying about every single person, you won’t last. You’ve got to limit who you care about. If they’re not someone important to you, you’ve got to be strong enough to step over the dead bodies and run.]

[No way, I can’t do that.]

[You have to. That’s the kind of situation we’re in right now.]

Dole said this with a serious look, having calmed his laughter, and I glanced at Saine for confirmation. He, too, was looking at me with serious eyes.

[Save your grief for later. If you don’t survive, you’ll lose even the right to shed tears.]

I swallowed hard and nodded solemnly.

[If I stay near you, I’ll just get in the way, right? Maybe I should stick with the grandpa next door?]

Honestly, I wanted Saine to stay somewhere safe, too. But as the Dauntless, that’s probably not allowed. More than anything, Saine didn’t want that. He would never think of abandoning his comrades and running away while they were fighting monsters in danger zones.

So I at least tried to make myself less of a burden, but Dole laughed at me, looking exasperated.

[That won’t work. It’s not exactly safe outside the town either. I’d feel better if you stayed where I can see you.]

[What do you mean?]

[If something happens to you, Saine won’t be able to function.]

I didn’t quite get it, but I felt relieved that it was okay to stay by Saine’s side. Even if they said it was a safe place, if Saine wasn’t there, it didn’t matter. I didn’t want to sit around anxiously wondering if he was okay.

[Saine, I’ll do my best not to get in the way.]

When I clenched my fists and nodded firmly, Dole laughed at me again.

[What exactly are you gonna try your best at?]

[Um… running away as fast as I can, I guess? If you tell me to hide, I’ll stay hidden.]

I’m not stupid enough to say something like, ]I’ll fight too.] There’s no way I could contribute to the battle, and with this flimsy body, I wouldn’t even make a good shield. All I can do is try not to cause trouble by running off or jumping out when I shouldn’t.

[I’ll listen to what Saine and everyone say. But if I’m really in the way, please leave me behind, okay?]

I looked up at Saine, who stared back at me with those inscrutable dark eyes.

[I don’t want to get in your way. I don’t want you or anyone else to get hurt because of me. I’ve already died once, and this is just a bonus life, so it’s fine, really.]

When I made my plea to Saine, a fist came down on my head with a thud.

[Ouch…]

He barely held back. That seriously hurt.

[Idiot.]

Saine said, then lightly tapped the hand I was holding my head with. His dark eyes wavered just slightly.